So this won't be my best blog post and it won't be very long but it's the one thing that God has been teaching me lately. So this month hasn't been my favorite month, and at the same time, it has been an incredible month. I'm going through kind of a rough time.
Through this rough time the one thing that has given joy is a dream, a dream that God has put in my heart, something to look forward to. This dream seems pretty impossible to me right now, I don't even know how I gathered the courage to go through with it, it's a surprise and I don't really want to say much unless it actually happens but it's something I have never really done before, something that will test my faith and my maturity and my personal life. I'm the type of person that has dreams then starts to think about all the technicalities and gives up because really, there's no way. This time is different, this time I'm going in and forgetting about everything that could make this impossible. The one life lesson that I am learning right now is this:
"Everything is possible until it becomes impossible. If it's possible, then you can achieve it, if it's impossible, then you know you can move on."
How does this relate to you guys? Well, recovery. Guys, don't make it impossible from the get go, sometimes we underestimate ourselves. Recovery is possible for every single one of you whether you see it or not. Sometimes it takes a little bit of audacity, a little bit of dreaming to make it possible, it just takes that still small voice, that whisper that says "I can do this". Sometimes you need a kick, a push, that's why we are here, that's why there's hotlines and professionals and people around you to help you out. It doesn't matter how many times you try or how many times you relapse, the only thing that matters is that moment when you succeed. Every time you put the blade away, every time you take a bite, every time you smile and every time you go to the doctor so you can get better. That's what matters.
I know a lot of you think that you have nothing to look forward to, no reason to keep living and I get it, your stories are so full of pain that it's impressive to see how strong you guys have been and how far you've gotten. If you can't find a reason to keep going, I'm begging you, make it. Yea, dare to dream, to have a purpose, dare to think you matter. I know, "easier said than done" right? Yea I've been there, but sometimes being happy takes a little courage. I remember my psych teacher telling me that smart people don't take risks because they're smart, it's up to the C level students to rule the world because they are average, not too smart to the point where they won't take risks but not to dumb to the point where they can't take risks. Forget about being smart, or technical, or "realistic", take a risk, take a chance, if the world has taken everything else away from you this give this to yourself. You deserve it.
The death of a dream begins where fear of what's possible starts.
"For nothing is impossible with God" - Luke 1:37